I’m taking a wild guess that you are reading 15 Signs to know a Lady is Not Interested in You because you badly want something more than casual with someone you adore. Sadly, you aren’t sure if she’s into you or not.
Well, it’s not uncommon to find guys surfing the internet searching for signs that indicate a lady they want is also interested in them. This is because, if you’re like most guys, you’ve experienced firsthand just how frustrating it can be to figure ladies out.
The truth is, women don’t make it easy for us. At each stage of getting to know them, you’ve got to find out whether your quest is a wild goose chase or if you still got a chance and should be persistent.
Realistically, learning that she doesn’t reciprocate your feelings can be hurtful but it’s important to know when you shouldn’t waste your time. Some ships just sail. Trains leave stations and this plane… has taken flight.
So, here are 15 signs to know that it’s time to cut your losses and take your quest elsewhere because this one… isn’t going to work;
1 – Chemistry
As daunting as it can be to read or see the signs that she’s into you, real chemistry is that undeniable connection or attraction shared between two people that instinctively makes them want to be near each other.
It’s human nature to feel the need to connect to someone you like and your body naturally finds ways to make it happen. It causes the need to hold, touch, feel, hang around, stare or be in awe of the person you share this connection with. It makes both parties comfortably spend time with each other without even noticing that hours have passed by.
When you think about it, you realize that chemistry is the basis on which other signs are built whether negative or positive. So, if you notice she’s not doing any of these things easily or her body disposition doesn’t scream she’s into you then she’s probably not interested.
2 – Communication
When you meet a lady for the first time and you succeed in getting her contact information, it can be a little slow to get her to communicate freely with you, however, if after a while communication still starts and ends with you every damn time then gentleman, that lady is not interested in you.
It’s no longer news that texting is a huge part of modern romance because it gives us the chance to stay connected even while we’re busy, but If you’re waiting a whole 24 hours to hear back from a girl you texted, chances are that responding to you is, unfortunately, not her priority. Although this might not necessarily mean she flat-out dislikes you, if she’s really into you, she’ll make an effort to let you know she’s busy.
Because texting has become so important to dating, being able to analyze her general texting behavior is key to finding out if she likes you. Of course, some conversations can be awkward or some girls shyer than others, but just like you might try to keep a conversation going with a girl you like, a girl who likes you will do the same. This means that if she’s not making any effort, it may be because she doesn’t care if the conversation goes anywhere.
I could argue that when a lady is not interested in you, she barely goes beyond the one-word response, she would never initiate the conversation, she’d be strangely reserved, would probably leave you on read and won’t be interested in knowing more about you or giving you information about herself than is required to stay friends. In reality, if she’s doing these things, she could be shy but a lot of the time she doesn’t really like you.
3 – Touch Barrier
One of the ways to know if a girl reciprocates your feelings is if she’s breaking the touch barrier. Every girl loves to be clingy or super touchy when she feels something for you, it’s an innate and natural desire to reach out and want to touch you.
One way they do this smoothly is to invitingly touch you on places like your knee, your shoulder, or your arm. But if this lady can spend hours with you and have zero urges to touch you or she dismisses your advances towards her then it’s apparent that you’re not bringing this bacon home.
Back in college, there was this one time I tried to hug a girl I adored, she dismissed it and told me she doesn’t hug boys. Although I didn’t like the fact that I was being turned down, I had to respect her wishes. A few weeks later, tides turned in my favor and she broke the touch barrier.
So, sometimes she may not be ready for physical contact because you guys only just met or for other reasons but if this goes on for a long time then it may be a big hint that she doesn’t see you as more than a friend.
4 – Two-Faced Syndrome
Trust me, you don’t want to get involved with a lady who treats you like you mean the world to her privately and differently in public. It’s not a good place to be in. It can mess with your mind, emotions, and you could end up with trust issues.
I understand that not every girl likes public displays of affection but if she likes you, she won’t flinch every single time you go over to hold her hand or try to act like her better half in public because she won’t want to embarrass you or make it seem like you guys are strictly friends in front of other people.
However, if she acts really weird about it every damn time then the hard truth is she probably doesn’t like you at all and is pretending for selfish reasons or she doesn’t like you enough to be proud that you guys are a thing. Either way, as I said earlier, you don’t want to be the guy on the receiving end of a two-faced thingy.
5 – Friendship Reminders
Think about it like this, the possibility that we may forget about an appointment that we’re scheduled for, makes us set reminders that go off at a specific period to bring it back to our memory. It’s the same way with girls. If she feels that you might be getting the wrong message as regards the status of your relationship with her, she would put out subtle reminders that you’re nothing but a friend to her.
One out of five guys pursuing something romantic with a girl would have heard cliches like “I love having you as a friend” or “You’re such a nice friend”. Though they are nice things to say, they’re just nice reminders that all you’ve got are pal privileges. Well, pal privileges come with perks, you get to hang out with her and her friends, you get to chat and text with her, and the best part, you’ll be the first person she calls when she needs advice.
So, if any girl says anything to you like, “oh, I’m so glad we have this friendship together”. “I’m so glad that we’re friends”, that should do it. This is not her showing interest in you. This is her showing disinterest in you in terms of romance and more than a friend kind of relationship, okay?
Well, just because a girl sees you as a friend doesn’t necessarily mean you’re stuck in the friendzone, but if she ever tells you, she loves you like a brother, it’s time to reevaluate your feelings for her and cut your losses because this ship has sailed.
6 – Flaking on Plans
Is making plans with your crush next to impossible? Is there always some reason she can’t hang out? And when you do finally make plans, does she bail at the last minute? All these excuses could be signs that she’s the busiest girl in the world but it’s more likely that she’s just not into you.
Time is one of the most valuable assets we have, so if she doesn’t want to spend it with you, chances are, you aren’t that important to her. A girl who likes you is going to want to spend time with you, and even if she is busy when you ask her to hang, if she likes you, she’ll reschedule.
A lot of guys get caught up in texting a girl often but she ends up flaking after they ask for a date. Since she’s still responsive over text they ask her out again and again, and each time they’re met with the same response. So, they get confused because they think, wait a minute. Well, she likes me. She’s responding to me; she is agreeing to a date. But the reality is, if she’s not taking the action, to see you, to meet up with you, or go on a date with you, then it’s clear that you’re just a texting buddy, or at least she’s someone that you’re just bothering all the time asking her out.
At this point, you just have to quit being persistent because she is hundred percent not interested. That said, the next time you ask a lady out for coffee and she says she’s busy right now maybe next time it means you might as well wait for the rapture.
7 – Too Straight-faced
Have you picked up on any flirting going on? Does she laugh at your dry jokes or try to act all cute around you? I’m not saying she’s going to take you as a pro comedian but one of the things women love is your sense of humor when they’re attracted to you.
I know for a fact that when a lady is into you there’s little you need to do to make her laugh or feel comfortable. It’s almost as if you become the funniest person in the world. So, you’ve got to pay attention, if she’s straight-faced whenever she’s with you then you’re probably barking up the wrong tree.
8 – Income and Demands
When people are into each other, it’s natural to worry about each other’s lives and careers. But if this lady is only interested in the financial aspects of your life, it’s a strong sign that she might just be pretending to like you. Normally, this type of girl tries to get closer to a guy with loads of money because they are interested in the lifestyle the guy can offer and not with him as a person.
The fact that you care about her and value the relationship you hope to have with her doesn’t mean you have to splurge on new purses, expensive restaurants, and luxurious vacations all the time. However, if she constantly demands certain things from you, it’s a sign that all she cares about is your money and you best avoid her because once there’s a reduction in the flow of your resources, she’d be nowhere near you.
9 – Empty Conversations
In building any relationship, there has to be substance to take your relationship to the next level. One of the easiest and most effective ways to show her you’re interested in her is by asking her questions about herself, plans, and goals.
However, if she shuts down despite all your attempts to have a deep and meaningful conversation, chances are she’s not interested in a relationship with you. Well, she may be talking to you, which is a good sign, but if all she’s got is “What did you have for dinner?” I’m sorry, my friend… She’s not interested.
More so, if she’s not willing to share her experiences with you or willing to hear about your childhood stories, family history, or opinions about fundamental life stuff, but would rather keep your conversations as simple as possible then this means that she doesn’t see you in her future and doesn’t want to build a basis of understanding and trust in your relationship.
10 – Not Ready Cliché
I think this is the easiest way to know if a lady is interested in you. Unfortunately, most guys think it’s some sort of challenge to make them step up or that maybe she’s playing hard to get.
The truth is if she tells you that she’s not ready, it means she doesn’t have a place for you in her world. I know it hurts to get rejected especially when you really adore her. Realistically, no matter how unready she claims to be, when she meets someone that she feels is the right guy for her, she’d welcome him with wide-open arms. So, the best thing to do for yourself is to listen and respect her wishes.
11 – The Ex-Factor
Breakups can be hard and difficult to get over, which is why you want to avoid a lady that’s fresh out of a relationship. If the girl you like happens to bring up her Ex a lot, it probably means she’s not over him, which puts you in a tough situation because you don’t want to put your time, effort, and energy into a girl that’s not over her ex.
Simply put, if she’s got excess baggage from her previous relationship, she’s not interested because if she’s trying to get to know you romantically, she would want you to know nothing is standing in your way. One way she does this is by not talking about another dude.
12 – I’ve Got a Boyfriend
Every day that the lady you like is in a relationship with anybody, that’s not you, she’s not interested. If she says she’s got a boyfriend, she’s not interested. Whether it’s true or not, if a girl has to tell you she’s got a boyfriend, it should be pretty clear writing on the wall that you don’t have a chance.
However, if she’s still flirting with you, maybe she’s complaining about her boyfriend, maybe she even says that she’s going to break up with him soon. Either way, let’s just say she’s in a relationship. The fact remains that she’s not interested because she’s with someone else and maybe she’ll cheat, but that would be terrible and you don’t want to be with someone who cheats because if you end up with them, they’ll probably cheat on you.
Unfortunately, some guys desperate for her affection will hold on to this because she says she’s going to break up with him soon or the relationship is not going well. Still, if you hang on to this you’re going to be in an uncertain situation. You’re going to be hanging on for so long, which is going to cost you opportunities with other women. So, if she says she’s got a boyfriend, nothing else matters, this is black and white. If she is in a relationship, she’s not interested.
13 – Body Language
A woman’s body language can say a lot. It can tell you if she’s on guard, if she wants you to be closer, or if she wishes you would just go away. And because a woman may not always come out and say she’s not into you, understanding what her body language is saying can be an incredibly powerful tool to let you in on how she feels about you.
So, to let you know you’re barking up the wrong tree, she’ll keep herself physically closed off. Crossing her arms, hiding her hands, or angling her body away from you are her ways of letting you down gently, A hint that says, “before you get ahead of yourself… you’re probably going to have better luck elsewhere.”
While not every person does the mirror thing; the act of copying a person’s gestures, posture, and actions to make yourself seem more similar to them, some people do it without realizing and it feels natural, while others force it and make it completely obvious. So, what does it mean for you if a girl just sits there while you’re shifting positions, trying to get her to mirror you? You guessed it… She’s not interested and it’s time to try your luck elsewhere.
14 – Tag Along
Let’s say, you try to get her to go on a date with you and she does agree to meet up with you. However, she’s doing it with her friend. Okay, she’s like, yeah, I’d love to meet up. Is it cool if I bring one of my friends? This nine times out of 10 means she’s not that interested in you with one exception that maybe she’s still trying to get to know you and doesn’t feel comfortable yet.
Although that’s understandable, it’s rare because most women will feel comfortable, especially when they’re interested in you. They would want the opportunity to be alone with you so you guys can connect and maybe even potentially get intimate.
So, understand that the reason why she’s bringing her friend is that she sees you as a cool guy, but she doesn’t want to reject you. This is usually a younger woman’s move because an older woman will just completely reject you and say no or not respond to your text or something like that. But just understand if this happens, she’s most likely not interested.
15 – Eyes on The Prize
Women have an almost magical ability to be aware of every single person who enters and exits a room. It’s a primal thing when a girl likes you her eyes will be glued to you for a few seconds when you enter the room so you best believe as soon as you walked in, she spotted you.
That means if the girl whose eyes you’ve been catching suddenly appears next to you, it’s because she wanted to be there. On the flip side, if she always seems to leave an area just as you arrive, then it’s probably not a coincidence. She doesn’t like you.
Given the fact that ladies are extremely complicated to fully understand, you can’t always be certain about their disposition towards you. Women are always changing and because of that, these reasons might not be all there is to know with regards to how you can tell if a lady you like is not interested in you. But on the flip side, you could also read up on how to know when they really like you.